Jackie Chan's City Hunter: Solid Dissapointment

Based on the Japanese Manga. City Hunter (Jackie Chan) the private investigator lands on a cruise while searching for a CEO’s daughter and teenage runaway, Shizuoko (Kumiko Goto). A group of ex-US special forces/terrorists are onboard as well, and their leader Colonel Macdonald (Richard Norton) is planning to hold hostage the cruise liner’s wealthiest passengers in order to rob them. Police officer Saeko and her partner are onboard in an attempt to stop Macdonald and his team. City Hunter’s (can't get over this 'name') deceased police partner’s daughter/his assistant, Kaori (Joey Wong), is madly in love with him and therefore has boarded the cruise as well. There, just saved you a watch. I guess I could tell you why this is a skip, though reliving the experience is definitely a favor and not a pleasure.

The opening scene starts with City Hunter and his partner in a buddy-cop like bit where they rag on each other and fight some criminals. His partner gets shot and as he croaks he tells Hunter to look after his toddler-aged daughter, Kaori. As his dying wish he asks Hunter not to seduce her. This is the first sign of many that the P.I is less of a Holmes type and more of like a Japanese Weinstein crime-fighter.

The entire movie is offensive to everyone involved. The women are treated no better than blow up dolls, and the men are reduced to heart eyes and ooga-boogas. All of it feels exploitive and there’s no heart-to-hearts or anything deep going on.

It’s not funny but it tries extremely hard to be. Instead of hitting a sweet spot it seems to jump, hop, and fly straight over into a sour one. The overacting was a form of cruel and unusual torture, the kind where you think it’ll never end. And it didn’t for the entire ninety-nine minutes of run time. Exaggerated tones and voicing, over the top falls, spastic gesturing, etc. I spent the hour and a half flinching and recoiling in second-hand embarrassment. There’s next to no Kung-Fu or fight scenes so all that pain and suffering doesn't feel rewarding in the least. I put no blame on the cast. Chan is a great performer and a decent actor when he wants to be. Clearly he didn’t want to be and I could sense that, and sympathized with why he calls it one of his least favorite projects.

There are two redeemable parts in this ‘thing’ that is supposedly called a piece of cinema. One: the colors and shooting. For such horrible acting, writing, plot and overall content it’s actually a really well shot movie. The shots take advantage of symmetry and shape and give the scenes a playful touch in doing so. The colors pop beautifully and there's a lot of deep, bright reds, yellows, blues, pinks and oranges which is made even better by great color coordination. The other redeemable quality is the final fight scene. It's well-coordinated and well-shot. Chan and Norton have chemistry and move crazy fast. Cool use of footwork and classic Chinese weapons too. Chan breaks out into a moonwalk mid-fight and still manages to hold his own. Great stunt work here too with Chan taking hits from chairs, tables and other sturdy furniture. It’s almost circus-like with the acrobatics. Even the music for this scene was well-chosen and added to the aura.

The flick is supposed to fit the original genre of the piece, the manga, but even within the demographic it is specifically made for it's reviled. City Hunter has had four adapations made in it's name and Chan's is by far the worst. The "Nicky Larson" French retelling is well-liked by fans. It's considered to have great cast chemistry and storytelling, but lacks martial arts expertise (which is a major strength of the more recently made Netflix adapation, and arguably Jacky's City Hunter). Word of Warning, City Hunter is made for a specific demographic, and if you aren't a fan of the manga/anime thing than you won't jive with any of these movies.

You know the saying, ‘my life flashed before my eyes’? Well during this watch I felt the opposite. I felt as though I could grow old, wispy and senile. That I could spend what the movie’s runtime felt like contemplating my entire existence and pondering about why am I here, watching this of all things.